This reminds me of the old legend of the farmer, his son, and the horse. Once upon a time, there was an old farmer who lived with his son and their horse on a farm. On fateful night, the horse ran off. The next day all of the farmer’s friends gathered around and lamented, “Oh! How unlucky that your horse ran off!” But the farmer said, “We’ll see.” Several weeks later the horse returned from the wilderness, bringing with it a horse friend. Now the farmer had two horses. All of the farmer’s friends gathered around, exclaiming, “My! How lucky you are that now you have two excellent horses!” But the farmer said, “We’ll see.” A few weeks later the farmer’s son was leading the new horse out into the field and it kicked him, breaking his ankle. Also, the horse had a rare strain of equine flu that is transmissible to humans, and the son caught that, too. All of the farmer’s friends gathered around and said, “Oh my! How unlucky it is that now your son cannot work on the farm!” And the farmer, fairly fed up at this point, threw his laptop at them and told them to get off his damn farm. This broke the laptop. Luckily, then the farmer got to have sex with a wandering monkey god. Unfortunately, the monkey god’s DNA was similar enough to a human’s that the farmer caught a simian-human immunodeficiency virus and died. Total bummer.
This is bullshit! I just wrote the best comment I ever wrote and then it got deleted! It was really funny. Team Kristen just can't get a win.
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of the old legend of the farmer, his son, and the horse. Once upon a time, there was an old farmer who lived with his son and their horse on a farm. On fateful night, the horse ran off. The next day all of the farmer’s friends gathered around and lamented, “Oh! How unlucky that your horse ran off!” But the farmer said, “We’ll see.” Several weeks later the horse returned from the wilderness, bringing with it a horse friend. Now the farmer had two horses. All of the farmer’s friends gathered around, exclaiming, “My! How lucky you are that now you have two excellent horses!” But the farmer said, “We’ll see.” A few weeks later the farmer’s son was leading the new horse out into the field and it kicked him, breaking his ankle. Also, the horse had a rare strain of equine flu that is transmissible to humans, and the son caught that, too. All of the farmer’s friends gathered around and said, “Oh my! How unlucky it is that now your son cannot work on the farm!” And the farmer, fairly fed up at this point, threw his laptop at them and told them to get off his damn farm. This broke the laptop. Luckily, then the farmer got to have sex with a wandering monkey god. Unfortunately, the monkey god’s DNA was similar enough to a human’s that the farmer caught a simian-human immunodeficiency virus and died. Total bummer.
ReplyDeleteHmmm. On a second read-through, I actually think this is pretty offensive, not funny. Imagine that.
ReplyDelete